Notes on nowhere

Another collection of blog posts I never got to properly finish or didn’t quite merit their own post.


Madvillainy by producer Madlib and rapper MF DOOM, aka Daniel Dumile, who died in 2022, aged 49

• No old age in hip-hop
As hip-hop as a genre celebrates its 50th anniversary this year, it’s somewhat tragic to realise how few rappers actually reach the grand age of 50.

We sadly expect it – almost to the point of cliché – that many rappers die in their 20s from gun violence and gang-related deaths but we don’t seem to pay much attention to the huge amount of rappers dying in their late 40s or early 50s. This has been a worrying trend. As you would expect, almost none of these deaths are from gangs, violence or guns.

Instead, many of the deaths are from causes usually associated with older people – heart attacks, pulmonary embolisms, respiratory failures and diabetes complications are all common deaths of rappers in their 40s.

I used to listen to hip-hop quite a bit in the 1980s, including a now-little remembered British rapper called Derek B. Born Derek Boland, Derek B was the first UK rapper to appear on Top of the Pops and feature in Smash Hits magazine. He pathed the way for other UK rappers and dance acts to follow when hip-hop was still in his infancy. Derek B died suddenly in 2009, aged 44, of a heart attack.

Boland was born and raised in Woodford, East London, not exactly South Central L.A., so there was little fear of gun violence which permeates a lot of American hip-hop.

Since Derek B’s untimely death, I’ve noticed many similar cases of rappers dying non-violent, ‘natural’ deaths before they reach old age:

Trugoy the Dove (De La Soul), 54, congestive heart problems
Big Pokey, 45, heart attack
Phife Dawg (A Tribe Called Quest), 45, complications related to diabetes
Biz Markie, 57, complications related to diabetes
Black Rob, 51, kidney failure
DMX, 50, heart failure
Prince Markie Dee (Fat Boys), 52, heart failure
Craig Mack, 47, heart failure
Nate Dogg, 41, multiple strokes
Magoo, 50, heart attack

Are some recent examples. This shocking and very long list of deceased rappers shows many don’t live past the age of 30, let alone 60 (with only two making it into their 70s).

The average life of an American rapper is not a bed of roses. Many are born and raised in the projects (America’s council estates but with more poverty, gangs, drugs and guns). To emerge as a creative artist from these conditions – and not be shot – is no mean feat.

There is no one answer as to why many black rappers aren’t living to old age. But it’s worth considering that life expectancy of black people in the States still lags behind that of white people (whose average is now 78 years old). That diabetes affects blacks more than whites. That black adults are 40% more likely to have high blood pressure.

The idea that rappers, rich and retired, are living a healthy life of luxury on a diet of salads and smoothies is not the reality. Upbringing and lifestyle, poverty and crime, health and education, and also food, drugs and alcohol all take their toll.

Sometimes it just seems like luck – it’s surely a miracle white guys like Keith Richards and Ozzy Osbourne are still going – and of course many white musicians die young, from Jim Morrison to Amy Winehouse, but recent deaths of white musicians such as Tony Bennett (96), Burt Bacharach (94) and Robbie Robertson (80) indicates that whites live far longer than black rappers (indeed, out of all the deaths of white musicians this year, one of the youngest was still 59, and that was Andy Rourke, bass player of The Smiths; most white musicians this year died in their 70s, 80s or 90s).


Encounter of the Spooky Kind

• Close encounters of the jiangshi kind
I mentioned Hong Kong jiangshi films twice briefly way back in 2011; when my brother and I first watched them on TV – in a short Channel 4 season of the films in the late 80s or early 90s, around Christmas time I remember – they were little known outside of Asia. Now, of course, they’re available online and on 2K restoration Blu-ray. I loved them at the time – a wacky genre mash-up that shouldn’t work but does, they combine martial arts and special effects with horror and comedy to create the jiangshi film.

Jiangshi folklore dates back to the Qing dynasty in China. The word jiangshi translates as ‘stiff corpse’ and stories involve reanimated dead bodies appearing as hopping zombies or vampires wearing traditional Chinese court dress. They are based on the Chinese tradition of taking corpses back to their homeland for burial – the hopping may come from the way they bounced when being transported, or the rigor mortis that had set in. The reanimated corpses were controlled by Taoist priests, whose job it was to take the bodies to their burial ground.

Two of the best examples are Encounter of the Spooky Kind (1980), starring, written and directed by Sammo Hung, and Mr. Vampire (1985), which spawned several sequels and kickstarted the whole jiangshi craze.

Despite a lot of symbolism relating to traditional Chinese culture, unintelligible to audiences in the west and probably most Asians too, the sheer energy, thrills, spills and laughs made the films fantastically popular.


• Top ten recent DVD Barngains

All bought from charity shops and priced from 49p to £1.99.

1. The Sarangossa Manuscript (Has, 1965)
2. The Hourglass Sanatorium (Has, 1973)
3. Two Lane Blacktop (Hellman, 1971)
4. The Night of the Hunter (Laughton, 1955)
5. The Strange World of Gurney Slade (TV series, 1960)
6. Akira (Otomo, 1988)
7. Casablanca (Curtiz, 1942)
8. The Leopard (Visconti, 1963)
9. Chernobyl (TV series, 2019)
10. Bob Dylan MTV Unplugged (TV show, 1995)


• Why nations?
I’ve never been into nations as a concept, and constantly bemused that international sporting events pitch countries against each other in competition – and that such events are extremely popular*. It means nothing to me. I’d much rather see sport teams such as vegetarians vs graphic designers, queers vs accountants, Daily Mail readers vs Guardian readers, Madonna fans vs communists.

Likewise when a disaster strikes in a foreign country, in the British press there’s always a tally for how many deaths are British, i.e. ‘Train crash in India kills 549, including two Britons’. I’d rather know how many graphic designers or Bob Dylan fans died.

*I just have to realise that I don’t understand or agree with most of society, culture, politics, sport – especially in the U.K. I can’t think of a duller country in the world.


• Top five most annoying writing techniques on the internet
The internet is different to traditional books, newspapers and magazines. People write funny on it.

1. EVERYTHING IN CAPITALS (or Every First Letter Of A Word In Capitals, For No Reason)
But then, the internet is billions of people ALL SHOUTING AT ONCE LOOK AT ME ME ME!

2. Demands
Read this, read more, listen to this, click here, buy this, subscribe to this, allow that.

3. The humblebrag
This doesn’t just affect celebs; everyone likes to appear modest whilst showing off. Artists and illustrators in particular love to do it: “Got bored at work and did this doodle, it’s not even very good” or “I just started drawing yesterday and I suck” whilst showing an amazing work of art, obviously fishing for compliments.

4. “When you’re/your…” statement
I don’t know why this annoys me so. Usually it accompanies a boring Instagram travel photo. The only example I could find was from someone I used to work with: “When your friends thought it was acceptable to spend £75 on a bottle of Jack Daniels” (with a photo of her holding a bottle of Jack Daniels).

5. Pointless lists (yes, this)


• Fantasy newspaper headlines
Tory party apologies for state of the nation then commits mass suicide
– Britain halves the price of everything
– Professional football banned, called ‘too boring for words’
– The Daily Mail ceases publication


• Upcoming photography projects
– Wiltshire water towers
– Cornish Art Deco garages
– Funny ways people hold their mobiles during phone calls
– Daffodil pickers
– Witches knickers (plastic bags caught in trees etc) in infrared


• Medium rare
I had to sign up with the website Medium in order to view an article I wanted to read. Inevitably there was a process to go through and I had to tick what subjects I was interested in. Aside from not having heard of half of them – AWS? Flutter? Ethereum? Kubernetes? – I found myself slightly panicking. Just what am I interested in? Not much it seems. Not sport or politics or technology or space or crypocurrency. In fact, most modern subjects I find extremely boring. I’m quite glad – if I was interested in everything I wouldn’t have time to do anything else. Like nothing.


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My daughter’s top ten films and books, aged 17